Folding

Do not talk to him again until he talks to you first. Don't. The military guy I mentioned in my last post, I feel like something has changed. But I don't want to make any assumptions. It shouldn't even make any difference to me because we're nothing really. He's destroyed two phones in a month and we can't talk pretty much at all during the week anymore. The conversation's drying up and I hate it. It's worked so well this far because I've been able to keep my negativity at bay. He's always come up with something to say even though he's not great with words and my mood has been balanced on the neutral thanks to him. Now I have this bad feeling in my gut and I really didn't need that right now. I had a really bad night this thursday and I was giving suicide some serious thought once again. I feel like I'm slowly sinking into cement and if I can't get out soon, I'll get stuck. Breathing gets harder and not worth the while. My mood changes so drastically between the opposite ends of the scale.and it makes me feel unstable. Just another state of illness to add to my list. I just don't understand why some people seem to be all bad like me.. Rotten

 

 

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